1
00:00:01,000 --> 00:00:02,499
Sweetie, happy...
2
00:00:02,494 --> 00:00:03,826
4-month anniversary.
3
00:00:03,830 --> 00:00:06,195
You are so amazing.
You know what's so great?
4
00:00:06,150 --> 00:00:08,749
Most guys, when they give
their girlfriends gifts,
5
00:00:08,694 --> 00:00:11,993
give beer of the month club, baseball
tickets, something they want.
6
00:00:11,905 --> 00:00:14,137
That's a gift certificate.
7
00:00:14,098 --> 00:00:15,398
To where?
8
00:00:15,401 --> 00:00:17,800
Thong world.
9
00:00:20,297 --> 00:00:21,563
Do I have to be here?
10
00:00:21,569 --> 00:00:23,234
James, yes.
11
00:00:23,222 --> 00:00:27,121
Since you're the only one who knows
about us, I like having you around.
12
00:00:27,005 --> 00:00:28,937
You are part of
this relationship.
13
00:00:28,913 --> 00:00:31,478
Absolutely, James. Can you
help me take my pants off?
14
00:00:32,410 --> 00:00:34,608
I'm done being
your third wheel, ok?
15
00:00:34,571 --> 00:00:38,570
It's gotten to the point where I'm
not even in my own sexual fantasies.
16
00:00:38,450 --> 00:00:40,482
It's always you two.
17
00:00:40,453 --> 00:00:43,385
Do you have any idea
how disturbing that is?
18
00:00:43,314 --> 00:00:46,046
Yeah.
19
00:00:45,984 --> 00:00:48,816
I can't handle it anymore.
The secret is too much.
20
00:00:48,750 --> 00:00:52,049
Don't think you're gonna go tell
anybody we're sleeping together.
21
00:00:51,961 --> 00:00:53,960
You guys are
sleeping together?
22
00:00:55,585 --> 00:00:58,084
Wow! I guess that means
you're getting married!
23
00:00:59,623 --> 00:01:01,155
No way.
24
00:01:07,030 --> 00:01:08,861
Maybe.
25
00:01:36,309 --> 00:01:37,742
Can't believe
they called off
26
00:01:37,740 --> 00:01:39,204
our softball game
last night.
27
00:01:39,202 --> 00:01:40,235
Yeah, that's a shame.
28
00:01:40,251 --> 00:01:43,217
Hey, nice game last night,
everybody.
29
00:01:43,144 --> 00:01:44,809
Carter, clutch hit
in the 7th.
30
00:01:48,675 --> 00:01:51,775
It s-sounds like
there was a game last night.
31
00:01:51,695 --> 00:01:53,728
No, you know,
as a matter of fact,
32
00:01:53,699 --> 00:01:55,664
they canceled
the rest of the season.
33
00:01:55,638 --> 00:01:58,303
Everybody else, our book club
meets tonight at 7:00.
34
00:01:59,644 --> 00:02:01,310
On field 3.
35
00:02:01,297 --> 00:02:04,730
Uh, Mike, per your request,
I've set up a meet-and-greet
36
00:02:04,635 --> 00:02:07,434
with all the community leaders
from the third district.
37
00:02:07,369 --> 00:02:08,768
What's wrong with the third?
38
00:02:08,767 --> 00:02:10,633
It's our most
diverse neighborhood.
39
00:02:10,612 --> 00:02:13,677
Each group feels the administration's
forgotten their needs.
40
00:02:13,600 --> 00:02:15,099
Which are...
41
00:02:15,094 --> 00:02:17,759
You know, I had 'em written
down here somewhere.
42
00:02:18,878 --> 00:02:20,643
Now, Mike, I can't
make these meetings.
43
00:02:20,626 --> 00:02:23,892
I have to present my summer camp
proposal for inner-city kids.
44
00:02:23,805 --> 00:02:25,904
No problem. Stuart,
you be Carter today.
45
00:02:25,871 --> 00:02:28,970
You mean pompous,
bald, and horny for guys?
46
00:02:28,892 --> 00:02:30,624
I am not pompous!
47
00:02:31,848 --> 00:02:33,347
Hey, what's new, James?
48
00:02:33,342 --> 00:02:35,275
I don't know
what's new.
49
00:02:35,249 --> 00:02:37,515
Why... why would I
know what's new?
50
00:02:37,475 --> 00:02:39,540
What am I, king of
the new things?
51
00:02:40,940 --> 00:02:44,239
For the love of God, woman,
would you get off my back?
52
00:02:46,154 --> 00:02:48,653
(LECHEROUSLY)
So, janelle...
53
00:02:50,032 --> 00:02:52,064
Datin' the mayor.
54
00:02:53,053 --> 00:02:55,752
Don't go there.
55
00:02:59,570 --> 00:03:01,502
Hello, janelle.
56
00:03:01,478 --> 00:03:03,943
Take off your clothes.
57
00:03:05,293 --> 00:03:07,225
(WHISTLING)
58
00:03:07,200 --> 00:03:09,532
You know,
I was just jokin'.
59
00:03:09,489 --> 00:03:10,854
Oh, yeah.
60
00:03:10,856 --> 00:03:12,121
(WHISPERS)
61
00:03:12,127 --> 00:03:15,460
Stuart, all next week,
I need you to come in at 6 a.m.
62
00:03:17,976 --> 00:03:19,576
Why?
63
00:03:19,566 --> 00:03:20,932
Why, janelle?
Because.
64
00:03:20,934 --> 00:03:22,099
Good enough for me.
65
00:03:24,049 --> 00:03:26,348
Whoo! Can you
believe her?
66
00:03:26,306 --> 00:03:27,772
Women, huh?
67
00:03:27,768 --> 00:03:29,800
Make it 5:30.
68
00:03:32,187 --> 00:03:34,220
Ok, sir. I wanted you to
know I'll be handling
69
00:03:34,190 --> 00:03:37,323
meet-and-greets with ethnic
communities from the third district.
70
00:03:37,243 --> 00:03:40,008
This is delicate stuff. Why
isn't Carter handling this?
71
00:03:39,944 --> 00:03:43,143
Sir, when it comes to the needs
of our minority constituents,
72
00:03:43,059 --> 00:03:44,492
I'm incredibly sensitive.
73
00:03:47,097 --> 00:03:49,696
Besides, fruitcake's busy.
74
00:03:49,641 --> 00:03:52,607
I want you to impress me
on this one, bondek.
75
00:03:52,534 --> 00:03:54,066
All right,
bring 'em all on...
76
00:03:54,060 --> 00:03:56,493
the lutherans,
the episcopalians...
77
00:03:56,443 --> 00:03:59,542
Heck, I'll even
sit down with a methodist!
78
00:03:59,463 --> 00:04:02,929
Actually, sir, we're pretty
solid with the white and...
79
00:04:02,834 --> 00:04:05,099
The really white.
80
00:04:06,744 --> 00:04:10,075
I was referring to Italians,
Jews, puerto ricans.
81
00:04:09,986 --> 00:04:13,119
Ah! The non-golfers.
82
00:04:14,247 --> 00:04:17,513
Mike, my body isn't equipped
for keeping secrets.
83
00:04:17,425 --> 00:04:21,457
Look at my arms and neck.
I'm totally breaking out!
84
00:04:21,335 --> 00:04:22,634
You can't tell.
85
00:04:22,640 --> 00:04:25,571
Really?
It's not that bad?
86
00:04:25,501 --> 00:04:28,533
Oh, you mean the rash?
No, the rash is hideous.
87
00:04:28,458 --> 00:04:31,457
I mean the secret.
You can't tell.
88
00:04:31,382 --> 00:04:34,081
You can't tell anyone, not now, not ever.
I'm sorry.
89
00:04:34,020 --> 00:04:35,487
Ok?
90
00:04:35,484 --> 00:04:36,515
Sorry.
91
00:04:39,742 --> 00:04:40,675
Hey, Mike.
92
00:04:40,696 --> 00:04:41,763
Hey, sir.
93
00:04:41,777 --> 00:04:44,077
Excited about
that interview today?
94
00:04:44,035 --> 00:04:46,734
It's just another magazine article.
It's no big deal.
95
00:04:46,674 --> 00:04:48,272
Really? There
haven't been that many
96
00:04:48,263 --> 00:04:52,362
since that whole "political
wonder boy" thing wore off.
97
00:04:52,237 --> 00:04:56,102
What do you mean, "wore off"?
It's not like I'm some old man.
98
00:04:55,988 --> 00:04:57,221
Oy! Ah...
99
00:04:57,229 --> 00:04:59,094
What's the matter, Mike?
100
00:04:59,072 --> 00:05:02,670
Softball. Pulled my ass.
101
00:05:04,285 --> 00:05:07,085
So after I finished running
senator field's campaign,
102
00:05:07,021 --> 00:05:08,519
I became
the deputy mayor.
103
00:05:08,514 --> 00:05:10,446
That's quite a list
of accomplishments
104
00:05:10,422 --> 00:05:12,153
for someone who's
only 32 years old.
105
00:05:12,138 --> 00:05:14,605
31 1/2, actually.
106
00:05:14,555 --> 00:05:17,253
But what
does age matter?
107
00:05:17,193 --> 00:05:19,724
Change it.
108
00:05:19,672 --> 00:05:22,871
Mike, can you help me? None of
these numbers seem to add up.
109
00:05:22,789 --> 00:05:26,620
Ah, here we go. Try shifting these
numbers over into this column here,
110
00:05:26,507 --> 00:05:30,272
re-add, and move the whole total
over into the next fiscal quarter.
111
00:05:30,163 --> 00:05:32,630
So, Mr. Flaherty, all these
people here work for you?
112
00:05:32,580 --> 00:05:34,646
Work with me, Audrey.
With me.
113
00:05:34,615 --> 00:05:36,614
And, yes.
114
00:05:38,494 --> 00:05:40,758
Mike, the council
didn't allot enough money
115
00:05:40,718 --> 00:05:42,717
to cover
my summer camp program.
116
00:05:42,689 --> 00:05:45,188
Try working other angles.
Get the community involved.
117
00:05:45,137 --> 00:05:47,035
When I was a kid,
we had bake sales.
118
00:05:47,012 --> 00:05:49,611
Mike, we're short
over 1.5 million.
119
00:05:50,605 --> 00:05:52,637
All right.
Brownies are a quarter
120
00:05:52,608 --> 00:05:54,740
and cupcakes
are 130 grand.
121
00:06:00,587 --> 00:06:02,520
Mr. fuscini,
the mayor is committed
122
00:06:02,494 --> 00:06:05,460
to the needs of the Italian
community in your neighborhood!
123
00:06:05,388 --> 00:06:07,987
What about that
unsightly construction
124
00:06:07,931 --> 00:06:10,230
in our business
district?
125
00:06:10,188 --> 00:06:13,787
We found... That when we get
into these types of situations,
126
00:06:13,685 --> 00:06:16,384
we tend to make
things worse, so...
127
00:06:16,323 --> 00:06:20,922
We've decided on a more...
Hands-off approach.
128
00:06:20,774 --> 00:06:22,507
So you're gonna
do nothin'.
129
00:06:22,491 --> 00:06:25,890
I hope it doesn't
go unnoticed.
130
00:06:25,798 --> 00:06:27,497
Good-bye, Mr. bondek!
131
00:06:27,482 --> 00:06:29,115
Oh, please wait.
132
00:06:29,104 --> 00:06:30,969
Hey, Mario fuscini!
Oh, my God!
133
00:06:30,948 --> 00:06:33,680
Little Stacey paterno!
134
00:06:33,618 --> 00:06:35,350
Oh!
135
00:06:35,335 --> 00:06:39,534
Well, it's nice to see the mayor has
someone with brains workin' here.
136
00:06:39,404 --> 00:06:40,737
Es stunad.
137
00:06:40,739 --> 00:06:43,939
Stunad!
138
00:06:43,856 --> 00:06:44,888
What'd he say?
139
00:06:44,905 --> 00:06:46,137
Stunad.
140
00:06:46,144 --> 00:06:47,877
It's Stuart
in Italian.
141
00:06:47,860 --> 00:06:50,660
Oh. I was gonna order some pizza.
You guys want some?
142
00:06:50,595 --> 00:06:51,528
Sure, why not?
143
00:06:51,548 --> 00:06:52,814
So tell me, Stacey.
144
00:06:52,820 --> 00:06:54,686
What's with this mayor?
He's a good man?
145
00:06:54,664 --> 00:06:56,763
Yeah. We need a couple
of pizzas at city hall.
146
00:06:56,731 --> 00:06:59,596
The name is bondek.
Stunad bondek.
147
00:07:00,800 --> 00:07:01,866
Ok, let me see.
148
00:07:01,880 --> 00:07:03,813
One word that best
describes me.
149
00:07:03,788 --> 00:07:06,854
Well, I'd have to say
"decisive."
150
00:07:06,777 --> 00:07:08,276
No, scratch that.
151
00:07:10,115 --> 00:07:11,480
Sorry, Mike.
152
00:07:11,481 --> 00:07:14,313
Am I late for the meeting
on my summer camp proposal?
153
00:07:14,247 --> 00:07:16,279
No, you're in the middle
of my interview.
154
00:07:16,250 --> 00:07:19,549
Now I remember you. You're Carter
Heywood, the gay rights activist.
155
00:07:19,461 --> 00:07:22,993
You went on that 11-day hunger
strike for same-sex marriages.
156
00:07:22,895 --> 00:07:26,061
Yeah! Yeah, it was, uh...
Particularly difficult for me,
157
00:07:25,978 --> 00:07:29,677
because I had just come off
a 100-mile aids walk.
158
00:07:29,571 --> 00:07:32,903
I had to be hospitalized.
159
00:07:32,813 --> 00:07:34,912
You know, I once
spent a whole day
160
00:07:34,880 --> 00:07:37,778
in a city
council meeting.
161
00:07:37,709 --> 00:07:39,441
If you've
got a moment,
162
00:07:39,425 --> 00:07:41,024
I'd like to talk to you
about my summer camp.
163
00:07:41,014 --> 00:07:42,980
I'm sure
she will, Carter,
164
00:07:42,953 --> 00:07:46,819
the next time she's doing a hard-hitting
expose on lanyards and bed-wetting.
165
00:07:48,422 --> 00:07:51,187
When I finish here, I'll gladly
give you a couple of minutes.
166
00:07:51,124 --> 00:07:52,690
Thanks.
167
00:07:57,482 --> 00:07:58,647
Wow.
168
00:07:58,658 --> 00:08:00,557
He is a really
fascinating guy.
169
00:08:00,534 --> 00:08:01,800
Oh, yeah, yeah, well...
170
00:08:01,806 --> 00:08:03,972
So what are you
working on right now?
171
00:08:03,935 --> 00:08:06,368
I will be, uh, redrafting
172
00:08:06,320 --> 00:08:08,253
a previously drafted
referendum
173
00:08:08,227 --> 00:08:11,827
to justify the allocation of funds
to repair a block of parking meters.
174
00:08:13,505 --> 00:08:14,937
Which I broke.
175
00:08:14,936 --> 00:08:15,935
Mm...
176
00:08:15,953 --> 00:08:18,452
See, I was driving
a bus...
177
00:08:18,401 --> 00:08:21,400
And I couldn't go
under 55 Miles per hour...
178
00:08:23,138 --> 00:08:26,270
Or the whole bus
would explode.
179
00:08:26,190 --> 00:08:28,389
Stop me
if you've heard this.
180
00:08:34,201 --> 00:08:35,200
Stacey!
181
00:08:36,649 --> 00:08:39,414
Rabbi judson is gonna
be here any second.
182
00:08:39,351 --> 00:08:43,183
I need you to do the same song and
dance you did with the Italian guy.
183
00:08:43,071 --> 00:08:46,470
It wasn't a song and dance.
I am Italian.
184
00:08:47,871 --> 00:08:49,804
I'll give ya
100 bucks.
185
00:08:49,778 --> 00:08:51,111
Shalom!
186
00:08:53,053 --> 00:08:55,452
Rabbi,
this is Stacey paterno...
187
00:08:55,405 --> 00:08:57,205
...witz.
188
00:09:00,428 --> 00:09:02,461
You are adorable!
189
00:09:02,431 --> 00:09:05,163
You know, I have
a nephew who's a doctor.
190
00:09:05,102 --> 00:09:06,434
Are you single?
191
00:09:06,437 --> 00:09:10,570
Am I single? What, with the
putzes around here? Pfft!
192
00:09:10,443 --> 00:09:12,809
Get yourself
a cup of coffee,
193
00:09:12,764 --> 00:09:14,796
then we'll kibitz.
194
00:09:14,767 --> 00:09:16,965
Oy! I'm svitzin'
like a khazzah.
195
00:09:19,885 --> 00:09:21,051
It ends here.
196
00:09:21,951 --> 00:09:23,817
Hola, senor Ramirez.
197
00:09:23,795 --> 00:09:25,328
Es un placer.
198
00:09:25,321 --> 00:09:26,820
Oh, likewise!
199
00:09:26,815 --> 00:09:29,714
But your friend here
es un imbecil.
200
00:09:29,644 --> 00:09:31,210
Oh...
201
00:09:31,202 --> 00:09:34,268
Uh... What does
imbecil mean?
202
00:09:35,685 --> 00:09:37,684
It means "ambassador."
203
00:09:39,658 --> 00:09:41,958
Imbecil stunad.
204
00:09:41,916 --> 00:09:43,282
Yeah.
205
00:09:43,283 --> 00:09:45,115
Yeah, baby!
206
00:09:46,462 --> 00:09:47,894
James, you ok?
207
00:09:47,893 --> 00:09:49,659
Do I look ok?
208
00:09:56,444 --> 00:09:58,310
Oh, my God, James!
209
00:09:58,288 --> 00:09:59,720
What?
210
00:09:59,719 --> 00:10:02,951
I think I see a small patch
of skin on your rash.
211
00:10:04,900 --> 00:10:07,399
Aw, sweetie,
it's not that bad.
212
00:10:07,349 --> 00:10:09,215
James touched
that bagel.
213
00:10:12,308 --> 00:10:15,073
Hey! They sent over an advance
copy of the magazine.
214
00:10:15,010 --> 00:10:17,009
You guys as nervous
as I am?
215
00:10:16,981 --> 00:10:19,147
I'm a little worried
about the cover shot.
216
00:10:19,111 --> 00:10:21,877
I wanted to go for a bogart
in Casablanca kinda thing.
217
00:10:21,813 --> 00:10:24,446
Well, how do I look?
218
00:10:28,521 --> 00:10:31,020
Like shaft.
219
00:10:33,130 --> 00:10:34,897
In shaft.
220
00:10:43,908 --> 00:10:47,341
"Carter Heywood strides down
the corridors of city hall
221
00:10:47,247 --> 00:10:49,912
with a walk that says,
I'm the man."
222
00:10:49,853 --> 00:10:50,985
Ha ha.
223
00:10:50,998 --> 00:10:53,196
Does my walk
say that?
224
00:10:56,243 --> 00:10:58,576
I'm the man.
Who's the man?
225
00:10:58,532 --> 00:10:59,698
You the man!
226
00:10:59,708 --> 00:11:01,340
I'm the man.
227
00:11:01,330 --> 00:11:04,362
All right. So Carter got
his picture in the paper.
228
00:11:04,286 --> 00:11:05,817
Mike... Are you
a little jealous?
229
00:11:05,811 --> 00:11:08,978
All right, fine. Go back to work, ok?
Meeting adjourned.
230
00:11:14,047 --> 00:11:16,111
This is like the
other night at karaoke,
231
00:11:16,080 --> 00:11:18,513
when you ripped the
microphone outta my hand.
232
00:11:18,465 --> 00:11:21,430
Mike, you sang
35 consecutive songs.
233
00:11:21,358 --> 00:11:23,357
You love abba.
234
00:11:26,095 --> 00:11:29,560
Do you really think I asked
to be in the spotlight?
235
00:11:29,464 --> 00:11:32,231
A 4-hour dinner. You couldn't
mention me just once?
236
00:11:32,168 --> 00:11:33,833
That is not true. Look.
237
00:11:33,820 --> 00:11:35,153
There you go.
238
00:11:36,555 --> 00:11:38,353
"And then I was hired...
239
00:11:38,334 --> 00:11:40,466
By Mike flaherby."
240
00:11:41,799 --> 00:11:44,599
I'm almost positive
I said "Flaherty."
241
00:11:45,741 --> 00:11:48,874
I'm pissed, but it still
goes in the scrapbook.
242
00:11:52,068 --> 00:11:55,700
The only reason I did this was to raise
awareness for my summer camp program.
243
00:11:55,597 --> 00:11:58,596
(WHINING) Your precious
summer camp program!
244
00:11:58,522 --> 00:11:59,955
I'm sorry, ok?
245
00:11:59,952 --> 00:12:02,151
But you are still
the deputy mayor.
246
00:12:02,114 --> 00:12:04,246
Oh, I thank you.
Thank you for that.
247
00:12:04,213 --> 00:12:06,579
Yes, indeedy. Thank you
very much, Carter.
248
00:12:06,533 --> 00:12:08,532
Hey, Stacey,
cancel the movers,
249
00:12:08,504 --> 00:12:11,669
because Carter's gonna allow me
to continue being deputy mayor!
250
00:12:13,082 --> 00:12:17,047
You know what? Nothing in this article
changes who you are around here.
251
00:12:16,929 --> 00:12:21,460
Did you see the epa's proposal to reduce
our subsidies? How can we stop them?
252
00:12:21,315 --> 00:12:22,515
I thought I'd call...
253
00:12:22,524 --> 00:12:24,589
actually, I was
talking to Carter.
254
00:12:25,608 --> 00:12:27,073
Flaherby.
255
00:12:32,728 --> 00:12:36,194
The mayor was so impressed with
my work on district three,
256
00:12:36,099 --> 00:12:38,797
he called me to the
mansion to reward me.
257
00:12:38,737 --> 00:12:40,503
But I did everything.
258
00:12:40,486 --> 00:12:43,584
When this door opens, I'm gonna be
taking a lot of credit for things,
259
00:12:43,505 --> 00:12:46,571
so try not to get
in the way.
260
00:12:46,493 --> 00:12:48,292
Stacey!
Stuart.
261
00:12:48,274 --> 00:12:50,306
I've gathered together
the representatives
262
00:12:50,277 --> 00:12:52,276
from the third district
for lunch.
263
00:12:52,248 --> 00:12:55,247
I thought it'd be nice
to have you here.
264
00:12:58,097 --> 00:13:00,063
It's all you, babe.
265
00:13:05,346 --> 00:13:06,279
Michael.
266
00:13:06,300 --> 00:13:07,399
Carter.
267
00:13:09,002 --> 00:13:10,934
I, uh... Think
we can agree
268
00:13:10,910 --> 00:13:13,009
not to get too
competitive over this.
269
00:13:12,976 --> 00:13:14,608
I agree totally.
270
00:13:15,996 --> 00:13:17,961
I'm bigger
than that.
271
00:13:19,270 --> 00:13:21,302
As am I.
272
00:13:21,273 --> 00:13:22,939
Good.
273
00:13:23,849 --> 00:13:25,181
Good.
274
00:13:35,007 --> 00:13:37,840
Yes! Yes!
275
00:13:37,774 --> 00:13:39,806
Shh, shh, shh.
It's double jeopardy.
276
00:13:41,874 --> 00:13:43,907
Mike, this competition
is ridiculous.
277
00:13:43,877 --> 00:13:46,275
It... it's over, ok?
Whaddaya say?
278
00:13:46,229 --> 00:13:47,862
Who's John
maynard keynes?
279
00:13:47,851 --> 00:13:49,083
(DING)
280
00:13:49,090 --> 00:13:51,289
WOMAN: Who is John
maynard keynes?
281
00:13:51,253 --> 00:13:54,085
Who is John maynard keynes?
282
00:13:55,163 --> 00:13:56,228
Who is Bob fosse?
283
00:13:56,243 --> 00:13:57,175
(DING)
284
00:13:57,197 --> 00:13:58,963
WOMAN:
Who is Bob fosse?
285
00:13:58,945 --> 00:14:01,078
Who is Bob fosse?
286
00:14:02,633 --> 00:14:05,899
WOMAN: I'll take famous
African-American homosexuals for...
287
00:14:12,297 --> 00:14:14,530
I woulda gotten that!
288
00:14:15,509 --> 00:14:18,108
It's probably
"who is ru Paul?"
289
00:14:20,183 --> 00:14:23,215
Who is ru Paul?
290
00:14:24,474 --> 00:14:26,539
Stacey, como esta?
291
00:14:26,509 --> 00:14:29,007
Stuart, help. I haven't
prepared any more Spanish.
292
00:14:28,955 --> 00:14:30,288
Just wing it!
293
00:14:30,291 --> 00:14:31,557
Hola.
294
00:14:31,564 --> 00:14:32,862
Ah...
295
00:14:32,866 --> 00:14:35,466
(SPEAKING SPANISH)
296
00:14:36,205 --> 00:14:37,370
De nada.
297
00:14:37,381 --> 00:14:38,381
Uh-huh.
298
00:14:38,399 --> 00:14:41,131
Yo tengo vestido rojo.
299
00:14:41,069 --> 00:14:43,267
Es muy bonita.
300
00:14:44,183 --> 00:14:45,683
Say something!
301
00:14:45,679 --> 00:14:48,110
Yo quiero taco bell.
302
00:14:50,192 --> 00:14:53,325
So, miss paternowitz.
303
00:14:53,245 --> 00:14:56,910
(SPEAKING YIDDISH)
304
00:15:00,811 --> 00:15:04,476
So, uh, do you have plans
for Friday night?
305
00:15:04,371 --> 00:15:06,071
Ha ha ha ha!
306
00:15:06,057 --> 00:15:07,755
What?
307
00:15:07,742 --> 00:15:09,073
That's
a good one.
308
00:15:09,076 --> 00:15:11,743
You see, it's funny
because rabbis can't date.
309
00:15:11,684 --> 00:15:14,349
Actually, we can.
310
00:15:14,291 --> 00:15:16,122
I did not
know that.
311
00:15:17,406 --> 00:15:20,405
I thought you might like
to come to our synagogue.
312
00:15:20,331 --> 00:15:22,363
I'm sorry, rabbi judson,
313
00:15:22,334 --> 00:15:25,899
but Friday night I have plans
to go to this club, and...
314
00:15:25,798 --> 00:15:27,830
on the sabbath?
315
00:15:27,801 --> 00:15:29,266
The sabbath.
316
00:15:29,263 --> 00:15:30,729
No. Right.
317
00:15:30,725 --> 00:15:32,958
The day of not
going to clubs.
318
00:15:32,919 --> 00:15:35,185
I thought you were
puerto rican!
319
00:15:35,145 --> 00:15:36,377
She's Italian!
320
00:15:36,385 --> 00:15:37,750
She's a Jew!
321
00:15:37,752 --> 00:15:40,718
Mr. mayor,
what is going on here?
322
00:15:40,644 --> 00:15:43,410
Sir, Stacey here has obviously
misrepresented herself.
323
00:15:43,347 --> 00:15:44,412
I'm leaving.
324
00:15:44,428 --> 00:15:46,427
No, no, no, people,
people, people,
325
00:15:46,399 --> 00:15:47,931
don't you see
what this means?
326
00:15:47,925 --> 00:15:51,624
Uh... Before now, you felt alienated
from this administration.
327
00:15:51,517 --> 00:15:55,116
And then you met Stacey, and you
felt you had a friend here.
328
00:15:55,014 --> 00:15:59,280
We don't need people who look
like you to represent you.
329
00:15:59,146 --> 00:16:02,179
No... We transcend
330
00:16:02,103 --> 00:16:04,436
ethnic boundaries.
331
00:16:04,392 --> 00:16:06,658
So what you're saying is
you did this on purpose
332
00:16:06,618 --> 00:16:08,450
to make a point.
333
00:16:08,430 --> 00:16:10,462
Sure. Let's go with that.
334
00:16:10,433 --> 00:16:12,999
Now, let's all go
into the dining room
335
00:16:12,944 --> 00:16:15,676
and, uh, sit down for a
meal as a community!
336
00:16:15,614 --> 00:16:16,948
Wonderful!
337
00:16:18,412 --> 00:16:21,812
Great work, sir. It looks like you
and I really pulled this one off.
338
00:16:21,718 --> 00:16:23,651
Stuart,
next week, 4 a.m.
339
00:16:27,821 --> 00:16:30,187
Nikki, I can't take it anymore.
You have to let me tell.
340
00:16:30,143 --> 00:16:33,510
I don't even wanna keep this a secret.
Talk to Mike.
341
00:16:33,418 --> 00:16:35,084
Everyone's scared of me.
342
00:16:35,071 --> 00:16:38,137
This morning on the subway,
I had my own car.
343
00:16:40,985 --> 00:16:42,817
Well, that's just lucky.
344
00:16:43,559 --> 00:16:46,658
It was rush hour.
345
00:16:46,579 --> 00:16:48,712
Nik, can I see you
in here for a minute?
346
00:16:48,677 --> 00:16:50,908
Look at it
this way, James.
347
00:16:50,870 --> 00:16:52,936
Can't get any worse.
348
00:16:54,653 --> 00:16:57,420
Why is Mike always asking
Nikki into his office
349
00:16:57,355 --> 00:16:59,521
for secret meetings,
huh, James?
350
00:17:01,108 --> 00:17:02,539
James?
351
00:17:09,342 --> 00:17:12,507
Oh, I get it. See, yesterday,
I got you a present
352
00:17:12,424 --> 00:17:14,457
that was really
for me,
353
00:17:14,428 --> 00:17:17,293
so today you got me a present
that was really for you.
354
00:17:17,225 --> 00:17:18,891
Well, they're
beautiful flowers,
355
00:17:18,878 --> 00:17:21,711
and I love them, and you
know what I'm gonna do?
356
00:17:21,644 --> 00:17:23,743
I'm gonna have my
picture taken with them
357
00:17:23,711 --> 00:17:26,043
so you can look at it
whenever you're lonely.
358
00:17:26,000 --> 00:17:27,132
Mike...
359
00:17:27,144 --> 00:17:30,076
And I suggest
you do the same thing...
360
00:17:30,005 --> 00:17:32,037
W-with your new thong.
361
00:17:33,343 --> 00:17:34,675
I didn't get you
these flowers.
362
00:17:34,679 --> 00:17:36,978
Ok, but I'd still
like the picture.
363
00:17:39,161 --> 00:17:40,660
They're from Carter.
364
00:17:40,656 --> 00:17:42,721
"Sorry if I stole
your thunder.
365
00:17:42,690 --> 00:17:46,122
You've always been a friend to me,
and that's really all that matters."
366
00:17:48,285 --> 00:17:50,117
Oh, no.
367
00:17:50,097 --> 00:17:51,530
Oh, no.
368
00:17:51,527 --> 00:17:55,093
I had Carter handle that press
conference on prostitution.
369
00:17:54,993 --> 00:17:56,092
So what?
370
00:17:56,105 --> 00:17:58,104
I might have told him
it was...
371
00:17:58,076 --> 00:17:59,875
Library awareness.
372
00:18:01,733 --> 00:18:04,065
You walk by them
all the time...
373
00:18:04,022 --> 00:18:06,454
And you never even
notice them.
374
00:18:07,900 --> 00:18:09,166
I'm here to tell you
375
00:18:09,172 --> 00:18:10,971
use them.
376
00:18:11,938 --> 00:18:14,403
Take advantage of them.
377
00:18:14,354 --> 00:18:15,587
Remember...
378
00:18:16,929 --> 00:18:19,695
You're never too old
to learn.
379
00:18:21,348 --> 00:18:23,646
Mr. Heywood,
what are you saying?
380
00:18:23,605 --> 00:18:24,837
That you've been to one?
381
00:18:24,845 --> 00:18:27,611
Ha ha. Are you kidding?
I was in one this morning.
382
00:18:27,548 --> 00:18:29,746
And I was having
such a good time,
383
00:18:29,709 --> 00:18:32,041
I found it hard
to keep quiet.
384
00:18:34,477 --> 00:18:36,409
Ok, that's it.
Uh, Paul?
385
00:18:36,385 --> 00:18:38,717
Paul will handle
any further questions.
386
00:18:38,674 --> 00:18:40,973
Oh, no, Mike, please.
387
00:18:42,362 --> 00:18:43,594
Is something wrong?
388
00:18:43,602 --> 00:18:45,534
Not at all. In fact,
I just wanted to, uh,
389
00:18:45,509 --> 00:18:47,741
thank you for
the beautiful flowers.
390
00:18:47,703 --> 00:18:50,235
I mean, the very
heterosexual flowers
391
00:18:50,182 --> 00:18:52,114
that you gave me as
a token of your manly...
392
00:18:52,090 --> 00:18:53,189
overcompensating.
393
00:18:53,203 --> 00:18:54,601
Got it.
394
00:18:54,601 --> 00:18:56,467
Mike, I gotta admit,
395
00:18:56,445 --> 00:18:57,611
I, uh...
396
00:18:57,621 --> 00:19:00,120
I really liked
having the spotlight.
397
00:19:00,069 --> 00:19:02,902
Carter, let me
tell you something.
398
00:19:02,835 --> 00:19:04,834
Ever since I was
a little kid,
399
00:19:04,806 --> 00:19:07,438
I wanted to be the smartest
person in the room, and I was.
400
00:19:07,381 --> 00:19:09,180
Then I met you, you
pushed me, and I'm happy,
401
00:19:09,162 --> 00:19:11,561
even though it made me feel
frightened and insecure.
402
00:19:11,513 --> 00:19:14,279
But I never lost respect
for you. That's it.
403
00:19:14,216 --> 00:19:17,148
Mike, could you say all that again?
I didn't catch all that.
404
00:19:17,077 --> 00:19:19,709
Of course you didn't.
I'm a bit quicker than you.
405
00:19:19,653 --> 00:19:21,752
I know you were mad,
so, uh...
406
00:19:21,718 --> 00:19:23,818
I want to thank you
for not getting petty.
407
00:19:23,785 --> 00:19:26,884
I like to think I'm above
that kind of behavior.
408
00:19:28,109 --> 00:19:29,841
Uh, no, sir.
409
00:19:29,825 --> 00:19:34,824
No, you cannot use your library
card to check out a prostitute.
410
00:19:34,658 --> 00:19:37,490
Although it's not
a bad idea.
411
00:19:37,423 --> 00:19:40,289
James, you look so bad, it's
almost stopped being funny.
412
00:19:40,221 --> 00:19:42,620
Hey, is that Stuart?
413
00:19:42,573 --> 00:19:45,005
Nah,
it's still funny.
414
00:19:44,958 --> 00:19:47,390
Ok, everybody, we still
got a lotta work to do.
415
00:19:47,342 --> 00:19:50,874
Nikki, would you mind running
fund-raising projections for next month?
416
00:19:50,776 --> 00:19:53,042
No problem. You want 'em
on disk or hard copy?
417
00:19:53,001 --> 00:19:55,034
How about humping naked
on the floor
418
00:19:55,003 --> 00:19:58,436
so everyone can see you've been
secretly dating Mike for months?
419
00:20:02,792 --> 00:20:04,791
God, that felt good!
420
00:20:09,341 --> 00:20:11,874
Look, this is
our personal life.
421
00:20:11,821 --> 00:20:14,186
This has nothing to
do with work, so...
422
00:20:14,141 --> 00:20:16,174
We're expecting you
all to behave maturely
423
00:20:16,144 --> 00:20:18,544
so it's not uncomfortable
around the office.
424
00:20:18,498 --> 00:20:20,397
Yeah. Sure, Mike.
Of course, Mike.
425
00:20:20,374 --> 00:20:23,206
Ok, I gotta go deal with a
problem with jurisdiction.
426
00:20:23,139 --> 00:20:25,338
You know, I'm trying
to look at that proposal
427
00:20:25,300 --> 00:20:26,899
on offshore drilling.
428
00:20:26,890 --> 00:20:28,488
(DOOR CLOSES)
429
00:20:28,479 --> 00:20:30,278
Offshore drilling.
430
00:20:30,259 --> 00:20:33,693
Sounds like he's taking
you on a boat trip.
431
00:20:39,955 --> 00:20:41,455
(LAUGHING STOPS)
432
00:20:42,753 --> 00:20:45,520
Nikki, I just wanted
to say you were right.
433
00:20:45,456 --> 00:20:47,822
We never should have
kept this a secret.
434
00:20:47,776 --> 00:20:49,342
(DOOR CLOSES)
435
00:20:49,333 --> 00:20:50,767
You saucy girl!
436
00:20:50,765 --> 00:20:53,097
Whoo hoo!
Hoo!
437
00:21:53,733 --> 00:21:55,333
MAN: Sit, ubu, sit.
Good dog.
438
00:21:55,334 --> 00:21:56,465
(BARKING)
439
00:21:56,466 --> 00:21:57,633
Moo.
440
00:21:57,683 --> 00:22:02,233
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